Please note that we have purposely left out any “weapons of limitless power.” Weapons like the Infinity Gauntlet, Cosmic Cube, and Black Diamonds are certainly powerful, but lack any creativity what-so-ever.
20 – Casey Jones’ Golf Bag of goodies – Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Casey Jones’ arsenal consists of just about any sports implement big enough to hit someone with and be carried around in a golf bag. A disgruntled former hockey player, Jones takes to the streets swinging hockey sticks, golf clubs, baseball bats and more, to take out his frustration on the criminal element. While there’s nothing technically special about the weapons at his disposal, it’s definitely a fanboy pleaser, not to mention super-cool, to see this guy with no special skills defeating evil with tools you could most likely find in your own garage or attic. Casey Jones, you’re an inspiration to us all.
19 – Captain Cold’s Freeze Gun – Flash
Theorizing that that the energy emissions of a cyclotron could interfere with the Flash’s speed, Leonard Snart created a freeze gun more or less by accident. He decided to go with it and give himself the title of Captain Cold. Cold’s schtick has been ripped off over and over again. Ever seen someone frozen in a block of ice? Cold has been doing it for 50 years. The visual of Captain Cold blasting ice all over the streets of Keystone City while the Flash intervenes is one of the most fun in comics. All thanks to the Freeze Gun.
18 – Scarecrow’s Fear Toxin – Batman Books
Dr. Jonathan Crane is an insane clinical psychologist. Using a variety of psychological tactics, he utilizes the fears and phobias of his adversaries. His bread and butter is his fear toxin, a concoction of his own design that leaves anyone, including the fearless Batman, weeping in terror and wetting their pants. The toxin brings out your worst fears and the Scarecrow capitalizes on them… Truly a character defining weapon.
17 – The Witchblade – Witchblade
The witchblade appears at first glance to simply be an ornate gauntlet, but on the hand of a proper host this symbiotic, intelligent weapon becomes much more. The witchblade is capable of turning into armor to protect its host from harm, swords and other stabbing weapons, shields, and even wings enabling its user to fly. It has on occasion even fired energy blasts, projectiles, and whips or grapples for climbing. A great all-purpose weapon that is only limited by the fact that it can become temperamental and difficult to control if not used frequently or in it’s mind, correctly. Also the witchblade only chooses one host per generation and those hosts are invariably female. If you are a man OR a woman not chosen by the witchblade, don’t try it on unless you like the nickname “Lefty.”
16 – Green Goblin’s Pumpkin Bombs – Spider-Man Books
Spider-Man’s arch nemesis employs the use of his jet propelled glider, and a big bag of pumpkin bombs. The great thing about comics is the kooky costumes and colorful characters and the Green Goblin is a perfect example of this. A flying goblin chucking pumpkin bombs is not only entertaining, but it serves as a perfect challenge for Spider-Man. A high speed chase, zipping around, Spider-Man has to protect civilians as well as himself from a barrage of explosions. These bombs not only compliment their wielder, but his enemy as well.
15 – Dung’s Dual Poop Cannons – Savage Dragon
One of the many throwaway villains that graced the pages of Savage Dragon, Dung is about as static as a character can be. He is a walking poop joke, armed (literally) with two sewage cannons. Where all that *spoon* comes from remains a mystery, but the fact remains that Dung has one of the greatest weapons in comic history.
14 – Black Knight’s Ebony Sword – Avengers
I always liked the juxtaposition of a knight running around in modern times fighting supervillains. The Black Knight wields the Ebony Blade, a magical sword forged by Merlin from a meteorite. It is indestructible, can cut through almost anything, impervious to magic, returns to the Black Knight’s hand if dropped or thrown, and can be used to teleport. Pretty handy weapon.
13 – Kevin Matchstick’s Bat – Mage
Kevin Matchstick is Arthur Pendragon (King Arthur to the less than literate) reborn, so naturally he needs a modern day Excalibur to wield against his foes. Excalibur in the modern age takes the form of a glowing white baseball bat which can be controlled from a distance and mentally summoned back to the hand. The Excali-bat can damage even the toughest of foes, and is apparently indestructable. I wonder what Matchstick’s batting average is with this thing?
12 – Johnny Blaze’s Hellfire Shotgun – Ghost Rider, Spirits of Vengeance
During a period where Blaze was not the Ghost Rider, his means of dishing out the whoop-*spoon* was his hellfire spewing shotgun. This weapon was created when Ghost Rider’s Hellfire was conducted through the shotgun into John himself. To clarify, hellfire is just like fire, except it can burn your soul. Shotguns are always cool. Shotguns that shoot soul burning fire? Brilliant.
11 – The Right Hand of Doom – Hellboy
When you make a living fighting the big scary monsters of the world, a giant stone hand can come in pretty handy (No pun intended). This particular giant stone hand (there are so many) is allegedly a catalyst to the bringing about of the end of the world. As of yet we haven’t seen in the comics how this would work, but until then, we can live comfortably knowing that somewhere out there, a 30 foot tall ape with the brain of a long dead dictator is probably taking one in the kisser from this bad boy as we speak. Rock on, Right Hand of Doom…rock on.
10 – Captain America’s Shield – Avengers, Captain America
Captain America’s shield is iconic, and virtually indestructible. It is an alloy of vibranium, an alien metal found only in Wakanda that had unique vibration absorption properties, and steel. The vibration absorbing ability of the vibranium allows Cap to withstand incredible amounts of force as well as lose next to no velocity when bouncing from one villain’s head to another.
9 – The Joker’s Acid Squirting Flower – Batman books
The Joker is not someone who is normally known for using lowly one on one weapons, typically relying more on weapons of mass destruction. Like all madmen however, he occasionally needs to deal some small scale, individual damage. While he’s used guns and and even a crowbar on occasion, his most memorable weapon would be a common clown accessory, the squirting lapel flower. Unlike the version found on most clowns however, the Clown Prince of Crime has a lapel flower that squirts acid, handily melting the face off of anyone unlucky enough to stop and smell the flowers.
8 – The Wrecker’s Crowbar – Avengers
The Wrecker carries a 4-foot long steel crowbar that was enchanted by Karnilla, the Norn Queen of Asgard, making it virtually indestructible. It is able to store and release the Wrecker’s enchantment, enabling him to share it among the rest of the Wrecking Crew. The guy is a New York brute that goes toe to toe with Thor himself… All thanks to his giant enchanted crowbar. Only in comic books can something so outlandish be so fantastic.
7 – Doc Ock’s tentacles – Spider-Man books
Ock’s titanium tentacles were originally part of a harness that was worn to allow him to manipulate dangerous radioactive materials. When a lab accident fused the harness to his body and gave him mental control over the tentacles, a classic comic weapon was born. The tentacles are individually capable of lifting anywhere from 3 to 8 tons (3 seems to be the minimum, while 8 is quoted in some sources) as long as one tentacle is used to brace himself. Each tentacle can also move at 90 mph and extends roughly 24 feet. Four 24 foot long titanium tentacles moving at 90 mile per hour? Thank goodness for Spidey Sense.
6 – Iron Man’s Armor – Iron Man, Avengers and Ultimates
While originally created as a means to keep Tony Stark alive due to a piece of shrapnel near his heart, the suit has become much, much more. Giving its wearer super strength, the power of flight as well as hand fired repulsor rays and more, depending on the writers whims, the suit has evolved into a complete wearable weapons system. A recent issue of Ultimates showed Stark in a suit that filled the sky over Washington DC, as it rained down a flood of destruction that would be the envy of most national superpowers.
5 – Wolverine’s claws – Wolverine and X-men
While we originally thought that these razor sharp Adamantium claws were added on to Wolvie during his Weapon X days, relatively recent comics have revealed that he always had claws, they just used to be made of bone. Whether made from bone or Adamantium (the hardest metal in the Marvel U, unbreakable and indestructable) these claws have most likely killed more people than the Black Plague, and don’t appear to be stopping anytime soon.
4 – Saint of Killers’ revolvers – Preacher
These Colt Walker style revolvers were actually fashioned from the Angel of Death’s sword, after he retired and handed his job off to the Saint. These old-school beauties never miss and are ALWAYS fatal. They are also capable of shooting through anything up to and including tank armor, and they never run out of ammunition. Did I mention that the Saint of Killers actually used these to kill the Devil himself, as well as a few thousand angels? I guess I just did.
3 – The Bowel Disruptor – Transmetropolitan
Spider Jerusalem’s weapon of choice, even beating out a good old-fashioned boot to the groin. The Bowel Disruptor does pretty much exactly what it sounds like it would with settings that include:
Watery
Loose
Prolapse
Shat Into Unconsciousness
Unspeakable Gut Horror
Rectal Volcano
And last but certainly not least, Burning Anal Geyser.
While I don’t think the BD is powerful enough to kill, what it actually does might be worse. Much Worse.
2 – Green Lantern’s Ring – Green Lantern, JLA
Each Green Lantern possesses a power ring that gives the user great control over the physical world as long as the wielder has sufficient willpower. The user can create damn near anything from the green energy packed in that tiny ring. Created by the Guardians of the Universe, the rings were then granted to worthy candidates. These individuals make up the intergalactic police force known as the Green Lantern Corps. This weapon is extremely powerful, but what makes it #2 on our list is the crazy methods the Lanterns use. Who doesn’t want to see a giant green fist smashing a spaceship to bits?
1 – Mjolnir – Thor, Avengers
This is a no-brainer. Mjolnir can only be lifted by one who is worthy, returns to the spot from which it is thrown, can summon the elements of storm (rain, wind, lightning), can open interdemensional portals and has been used to travel through time. It can absorb energy and release it in a chosen direction, repel magic, create vortexes, and detect illusions. Thor hurls Mjolnir and holds on to achieve flight. Almost nothing is capable of withstanding a hammer blow or throw. Inarguably the greatest weapon in comic history. Long story short… Mjolnir translates into English as “That Which Smashes.”
